Leaving Vietnam

My last week in Hue was a mixture of excitement to be going home and sadness that I was leaving everyone that I have met there. Especially the kids. I found it really upsetting. I had to say goodbye to my TX class and i knew that I would be upset but I hadnt expected such a reaction from them. The little girl Hien who had been quiet and distant in the beginning had gradually warmed to me. It was her 13th birthday (i think) while i was there and i threw a party for her. she hadnt had a party before. i got them all gifts, not just her, so they didnt feel left out and we had a great time. when i say i think she was thirteen it is because in vietnam when you are born sometimes you are 1. other times you are 0. its completely mental. she looks about ten. but she thinks she is 13. anyway, we had a great last lesson. when it cam time to say goodbye they were all really sweet and seemed sad that i was leaving. they gave me the prize red chilli that thye had grown in their vegatable garden. it doesnt sound much but it was a big deal as they treated this thing like a pet and carried it around everywhere and stuff. i think it was the best thing that had ever come out of their garden. i really liked the older ones who i felt i had got to know quite well because they were able to communicate better in english. it must be hard for them to have someone come into their life, just start to get to know them and then it is time to leave again and for the whole process to start again. hien was the only girl in the class and by the end was quite taken with me in the way that i used to be with older girls at school. she made me bracelets and tried to write my name n the board for me arriving and drew me pictures in her spare time. i miss them already. for the last lesson i taught them how to write letters and bought them envelopes and stamps. hopefully they will find a way of posting them.
so then i left Hue.... although my ridiculous amount of excess baggage proved to be no problem...the actual journey to the airport was. the bus from hue to da nang that i had to get was super late and they had over sold tickets which caused a big fuss. poor vietnamese people doing the journey had to give up their seats for the westerners. although totally unfair, i was kind of relieved as someone would have had to physically remove me from the bus before i would have given up mine...even though i was sitting beside an incredibly smelly man!!! he was vile.
once we eventually got going, half an hour late, we still stopped for a frigging 35min break at the cafe down the road that the bus company has a deal with.(it is only meant to be a 2 hour journey). but if they bring the bus to the restaurant they get a cut of what we spend, and the opportunity to make some more cash whether we were late or not meant we were stopping! all of this is done in the open, they dont even try to hide the fact that they are doing it because they get a cut. the vietnamese arent ashamed of living in tin huts and sleeping on rags. there is no shame in being poor. nor is there any shame in their desperately trying to milk every western tourist for all they can get! i have been ripped off right in front of my eyes every day for a month. its mildly irritating. but it seems to be the vietnamese way. and i guess i can afford it.
anyway, by this point i was seriously agitated and freaked out that i would miss my plane. got off the bus and eventually got a taxi... why is it when u dont want one they stalk you by crawling along the curb beside you and when u do want one they are playing hard to get! anyway, got to the airport (more of an aircraft hanger really) at 5.40 (for 6.30 flight) although, as usual, there was no sense of urgency and it seemed i had been panicking for nothing. the flight was good. even aeroplanes seem luxurious to me now....table service...clean cutlery...chilled white wine...even a blanket! i think i must have been overtired as i got really sad on the plane. just thinking about the kids. and how the trip was over. and the general tragedy of vietnam. it seems so unfair that i can just fly in and out of their life and they are stuck there. the babies will be adopted but for the older kids they have no choice but to stay in that orphanage untill they are 18. then if they do well they will have a shop and scrape by. its a continuous struggle. no one wants the kids over 4. and kids that have any surviving relatives often cant be adopted. only the ones who have nobody. at TX last week some of the kids who did have distant relatives got to visit them for a couple of days. 4 of my kids stayed behind. they dont even have a cousin to go see. and when i asked them how they felt when the others go home they said 'even more lonely than usual'. the people across the aisle must have though i was mad as i sobbed my way to singapore.
as soon as i arrived i felt almost awkward at how stark and clean everything and everyone was. came to the hotel, checked in my room and immediately ran a bath to soak off all the grime and dirt i feel like i have picked up. i swear to god i think this tan is probably half dirt! sickened myself by eating too much breakfast out of sheer greed and went to the city to explore. it was the weirdest sensation to be walking around a city, bustling with people and taxis and shops....gucci...prada...louis vuitton. its surreal that two hours away my kids are sleeping on mats. i dont mean for one second that it wasnt great to be there, in fact from first impressions i think singapore is absolutely amazing, its just bizzare to get your head round.
i had better go as someone needs to use this computer but one quickother thing that is quite funny. last weekend in vietnam heather and i went to hanoi and toured ha long bay. it was brilliant. we stayed in a proper hotel in the city and turned out that jamaica were playing vietnam at football in the stadium round the corner. the players were staying in our hotel and we got chatting. they were really nice and offered to give heather and i tickets to the game. we couldnt go as we had to head home but it was nice to meet them. anyway, now i am in singapore and in my hotel is the oman team who are playing indonesia. i had to move rooms...it turns out to their floor, and this morning at breakfast they invited me to a lunch and to go and watch them play tomorrow night. isnt that weird that i meet two football teams in a week. do you have any idea how many girls in glasgow would love this!!!!!